The absolute worst part is that while I'm struggling to put this episode behind me, these annoying, hopeful little thoughts and reminders keep finding their way into my head. I know it's just because I can't quite believe he would say a lot of the things he said if he had no actual intention of following through, and it's hard for me to think about someone willfully letting me down like that. Especially someone who seemed so trustworthy.
He went into this knowing that I worked just across the hall from him, and then he gave me his mobile phone number. And still he said those things implying that we'd have a really nice rose champagne sometime, having a "terrific time together" this week at dinner and offering me near free reign with his 8-burner stove. Geez, how i hate the thought of those things now. I feel like a real fool, but all I can do is cultivate these nauseatingly excuse-ridden thoughts that are only driving me crazier.
Actually, as I write this, they seem to be subsiding. Maybe all it takes to exorcise your demons is writing them down.
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